The other day, I watched Chicago, the movie. It’s one of my favorite movies and mostly, because of the music. I’m a sucker for musicals as it is – my kids have watched Mary Poppins, The Sound of Music and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang since I could get them to sit still for longer than 5 minutes. Old classic musicals are quality.
Anyway, this all got me thinking about dreams and when last I’d actually thought about mine. Since I was a little girl, I’ve wanted to be on Broadway. Theatre has always been my first love. Musical theatre – that’s my game. I was in musicals all through my school career and since I could talk, I’ve loved to sing. There’s an electricity you get from performing for a live audience. There’s a certain camaraderie between a cast on stage that you can’t describe. It’s like an artistic chemistry that buzzes between people who share a common passion for the stage. Ok, I’m gushing.
So, since I’ve had my kiddies, I subconsciously gave up dreaming. Ok, I have dreams that are mommy-specific like “oh I dream of the day that I can sleep uninterrupted, longer than five hours at a time” or “oh I dream of the day that my living room doesn’t look like a toy factory that blew up and I can see the floor.” But in terms of MY DREAMS, the ones I had from when I was a baby and disappeared when I had my own babies? Those were packed so far away in the attics and basements of my mind, that I had all but forgotten them. Watching Chicago the other night, it was like a trip into the back roads of my mind.
When you become a mom, it’s almost as if God turns a switch on in your being and you automatically push everything related to you – your dreams, your needs and wants, your sleep! – onto the back burner and the funny thing is, you’re happy to do it! The very essence of being a mom, in my opinion, is ensuring your children are cared for – emotionally, physically, spiritually – and whether you have one child or five children, that means that you’re always at least second or third in the queue, and you’re totally happy and content with that.
Don’t get me wrong. I think that’s the way it’s meant to be. It’s a season of a mother’s life. But I think once your kids reach a certain age, while kids should always be a top priority, life starts to allow you space to dream for yourself again. Your kids will start to follow their own dreams and you’re bound to be an integral part of helping them reach their goals and aspirations. They start to spread their wings, which will give you chance to spread yours.
C S Lewis said: “You’re never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.”
Hold on, Mommy and keep dreaming, for you. There will come a time when you can once again follow your dreams if you want to, and on the sidelines, you’ll see your babies (who aren’t so baby anymore), cheering you on, knowing how much you’ve given up to watch them chase theirs first.
Oh and keep your eye on Broadway. You might see me flying in on an umbrella, singing a cracking version of A Spoonful of Sugar – hey, I’ve got the experience looking after kiddies, don’t I? 🙂 Mary Poppins, I’m coming for you. Give me ten years or so.